They may seem like tasty, unassuming vegetables, but beware of beets despite their temptations. They will turn your bodily fluids red, which can be extremely disturbing. I don't need to explain why. There's only two colors I want to see in that bowl after I go. I won't talk about them, but I think we all have an unspoken agreement on what they are. It's too bad too, because beets are delicious. They are one of nature's little candies.
They've got a hint of sweetness to them, which makes the chocolate a welcome pairing. Is there anything more romantic than a plate of beets and chocolate on white sheets? You and your lover can spend a night eating them and making love. The next day you do full laundry from all the beet juice getting everywhere, and you go to the emergency room because you think you have internal bleeding.