It's never any fun when you start to suspect your partner of messing around. No matter who does the deed, there's no going back from it. You can try all you like, but the relationship has been destroyed. If you're starting to think it's happening to you, these signs will either make you feel better or confirm the worst. Are you sure that she's fooling around on you? If she's doing one or more of these things, it could be bad news...
#1. If she's nagging you non-stop, something might be up.
As much as TV shows and movies like to show women as nagging harpies who are forever trying to replace your mother, the truth is that women really aren't that bad. Considering how much stupid stuff guys do, they really put up with (and stay silent about) a lot of crap. So if she does start nagging, it's not because she's suddenly a bore. It's because she's working on her argument to break up with you.
#2. A sudden new friend might be a sign.
Many women make new friends all the time. It's totally normal. But if she's hiding those new friends from you - like you see them in Facebook photos and have no idea who they are - then it's a good time to start worrying. Ask about them and you'll have your answer straight away - it'll be written all over her face if they're someone special.
#3. A sudden interest in your day to day routine.
There's a number one trick to cheating: don't get caught. The easiest way to do this, of course, is to make sure your partner is never there to see you in the act. Which is why all of a sudden she's started to be really interested in where you're going to be during the day, at what time, and for how long. It's so she can make absolutely certain she won't be there too.
#4. When she seems to be preoccupied, she might be thinking about someone else.
Once upon a time, you got all her attention and she got all yours. Nowadays, though, you can start talking about the new season of Grey's Anatomy and she still stares off into space like you're talking about astrophysics. Maybe she's stressed about work, or something like that. But when has a woman ever stopped herself from talking about that?
#5. When confronted, she stays silent.
It could be one of two things, actually: either she stays silent when you ask her, or she oh-so-casually steers the conversation away into a different direction. Either way, that's a bad sign. No-one wants to lie, especially women, and she'll do anything to not be that person. Even though she's already started one of the biggest lies of all.
#6. If she's hiding her phone, things might be going south.
Not just her phone, either, but her computer and diary too. Often it's the simplest signs that are the most obvious. Has she changed her passwords recently? Is she quickly closing browser tabs when you enter the room, like a teenager looking up dirty pics? To be fair, she could be in the process of doing some grand and secretive romantic gesture, like buying you that Jaguar you always wanted. Or she could just be having an affair.
#7. She's not interested in romance anymore.
Sure, sometimes sex isn't on the top of her list of things to do. But holding hands and kissing over a bottle of champagne? There's literally no girl on the planet who'll turn that down. Unless, of course, she's getting that from a different source entirely, and doesn't need your kissing and hand holding anymore.
#8. She pays more attention to her phone than you.
This one's tough, of course, since pretty much everyone these days pays more attention to their phone than the people around them. Other people's Facebook feeds: so fascinating, right? So she could just be interested in the cronuts that her best friend just made, or maybe you really are just as boring as hell and she's reading Wikipedia's take on naked mole rats instead. Or she could be cheating on you.
#9. She suddenly got a lot busier.
Do you remember the time that you didn't need an appointment to see her? When the two of you could hang out, with no prior planning or need to be anywhere? If it's still like that, then congratulations - she's a keeper. But if it's proving frustratingly hard to find a spare spontaneous second with your lady, then she's either got a lot on her plate right now, or she's found another way to spend her quality time.
#10. She's buying new clothes often.
Girls, unlike guys, dress to impress. Once upon a time, at the start of the relationship, she was dressing to impress you and would spend hours agonizing over which outfit to wear. Now, though, she doesn't care so much. But if she's started shopping like a madwoman again, then there's someone else in her life she wants to look good for. And that someone might just be taking those clothes off.
#11. New lingerie that never gets worn when you're together.
In the same way there's lingerie. It's like the present that you have to unwrap, and a way of making her feel sexy. The thing about lingerie is that no matter what, she's going to use it. That shit is expensive. So if you're seeing new lacy things around the house, but when you unwrap your present all you get are some old granny panties, then they're being used somewhere else.
#12. Spending less time with your family or friends.
When a relationship melts down, your family and mutual friends are often caught in the crossfire. Often they have to take sides, or try and console both parties, or are simply witnesses to some uncomfortable secrets. No-one wants to involve the people you love into things like that, so if she's pulling away from them, it could be a hint that she's ready to split.
#13. You begin to notice emotional distance.
Men are very good at separating emotions and sex. In fact, they're very good at separating emotions from just about everything. Women are not, and when they do start to disconnect - trust us, you'll know it when it happens - it's a very deliberate choice. It means that they're mentally preparing for a messy breakup, and mentally preparing to not get hurt.
#14. She doesn't answer certain phone calls when you're around.
This one's really a no-brainer. There is theoretically a reason why a person might not pick up their phone, but in reality, there's absolutely no way a person could refuse the demands of their cell. Well, there is only one exception, and that's when the receiver doesn't want whoever's in the room to hear who they're talking to. And what they're talking about.
#15. She suddenly becomes dreamy, but it's not directed at you.
You can imagine all the classic signs, like twirling her hair, blushing deeply, laughing nervously, and smiling when she's just looking out the train window. Those are the signs of flirtation and dreamy love, and you've seen them before because once upon a time, they were all about you. Now they're happening again, and unless you've suddenly become hella romantic, it's definitely not about you.
#16. She now enjoys her independence.
Independence is totally cool, but if it's been a month since you heard from her last, it's fair to say that it's probably over. Even if it's just a few days at a time with no word and no explanation, it's still looking a little suss. Not that you have to know where she is at all times. But if she's the type that's glued to her phone, and you're not getting any of the updates? Put up those "Missing" posters.
#17. If she leaves the room when the phone rings, be warned.
This is one step up from simply ignoring incoming calls. This is the end times, in fact, when she no longer has the decency to take her infidelity and keep it outside the house. Basically, she doesn't care about you anymore - the only reason she's not talking to him while you're right there is because she doesn't want the confrontation just yet.
#18. What does when she's out might be an indicator.
Eyes. The doorway into the soul. As The Eagles knew, if you're lyin', you can't hide it in your eyes. And it's true - they really do say a lot more than slippery words ever can. Does she no longer meet yours? When she talks to you, are they smiling, or glazed over? Or are they flitting about the bar, looking for a better match?
#19. If she's not afraid to show her annoyance, something might be up.
Communication is the key to every successful relationship, but sometimes it can be a double-edged sword. If she tells you that she's unhappy with the relationship, for example, it's usually a sign that something needs to change. But it also could be a thick hint that she's justifying something (or someone!) that she's done, or soon to do. There's only one way to find out, unfortunately - keep talking.
#20. If you smell a strange new scent on her, she might be straying.
Since this one's a dead giveaway, it's kinda unfortunate that it doesn't happen as much as it does in the movies. First off, she's not going to be bathing in that guy's aftershave, no matter how much she likes him. Secondly, it requires the nose of a police beagle to even tell the difference most days. Still, keep a nostril out for any changes. And if she starts smelling like weed, marry her.
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