Believe it or not, many countries around the world are riddled with centuries-old laws that, for one reason or another, have remained in effect despite how utterly ridiculous they seem to be. From not being allowed to use makeup in public to wearing a hat backwards, these laws were seemingly designed by some low-life producer wanting to make a hit reality TV show. But don't be fooled, because the following laws are very real and they can easily cost you a hefty fine, or even an indefinite amount of time in jail.
Extramarital Relationships Are Illegal in Dubai
Every culture enjoys their share of extramarital affairs, except if you're unlucky enough to commit adultery in Dubai. That's right, extramarital sex is so frowned upon that the culprit could face actual jail time if convicted. If that doesn't convince you to keep it in your pants, then we don't know what will.
Women Can't Drive in Saudi Arabia
It's hard to believe that women are still forbidden from performing the simplest activities in this day and age. Take Saudi Arabia, for example, where any woman driver is effectively breaking the law. If we had to guess, maybe they're afraid of women running over the very idiots to make up these laws as payback.
Women in Massachusetts Cannot Have Sex on Top
Massachusetts has really cleaned up their act over the years, but if there's one thing the state doesn't tolerate, is the horrific act of a woman being on top during sex. While a girl's chances of getting in trouble is highly unlikely, you just never know what disgruntled judge might put this law into effect if she's ever outed by an ex-boyfriend.
Talk Dirty to me. On Second Thought... Don't
You may see your spouse naked in bed humiliate each other, do some painful spanking, and even spit in one another's faces during the deed. But don't you dare talk dirty, or law enforcement might just come knocking on your door if they overhear a word.
Marriage: No Puberty? No Problem
Some countries are bound to have certain laws that we simply have to respect, no matter how much we may disagree. Except, of course, when it potentially involves underage marriage. Did you know there's no minimum age requirement to mary in Saudi Arabia? We can only hope some seven-year-old girl isn't tricked into playing doctor by the wrong, middle-aged dude.
Wearing False Teeth Requires Husband's Consent
Okay, Vermont, what in the actual f*ck is going on here? A woman reportedly needs permission from her husband before wearing false teeth. The state knows how incapable women are of making their own decisions, right? so of course the knight in shiny armor must step in and guide her every step of the way.
Mo Money, Mo Problems
Speaking of weird laws around the world, it's illegal to step on money if you live in Thailand. While there are no known (recent) cases of anyone being prosecuted, all it takes is one dick to find you guilty of such a heinous crime. Next time you spot money on the ground, do yourself a favor and run as fast as you can.
When Hitting the Wife is Acceptable...
Attention, sadists everywhere: if you're tired of not being able to beat your wife, simply move to Arkansas and all your problems will be solved. That's right; hitting your so-called property is absolutely okay once per month, where the law will be there to protect you all the way. Hell, they might even join in the fun.
Even Mo Money, Even Mo Problems!
Remember when you used to tie a dollar bill to a piece of string and pull it whenever someone tried to pick it off the ground? Okay, neither do we. But if this ever occurs to you while in Pennsylvania, be ready to face a hefty fine or (at the very least) be relentlessly questioned by authorities.
Keep that Mustache to Yourself
Some of the craziest laws are actually not found in exotic places, but rather in well-developed countries such as The United States. If you have the audacity to sport a good mustache and want to kiss someone in public while living in Iowa, think again. That horrific facial hair might just get you in a heap of trouble with authorities.
Will you Marry Me, Cousin?
So let's say you've always had a thing for your cousin, but the fact that she's family prevents you from getting closer. Well, are you willing to wait until age 65 and move to Utah? In that case, you are free to marry that beautiful family member and inbred to your heart's content. So bring that Viagra and get the party started!
Yet More Toilet Etiquette
Do you live in Switzerland and desperately need to take a dump after 10pm? Well, you're shit outta luck, because the toilet is mostly off limits. You can try flushing, but then you risk authorities knocking on the door and pissing all over your once-peaceful night. I'll just hold it until morning, thanks.
No Farting, or Else
Florida is a place where freedom thrives, as people seemingly do whatever they wish under constantly beautiful weather. Just be careful about farting after 6pm on Thursdays if you're in public. You will get much more than an earful from nearby victims, as the police might be present and ready to handcuff you on the spot.
I Rather Die than Face Jail Time
One day you're at the House of Parliament in England, shooting the shit with your fellow lawmakers and politicians. Suddenly you suffer a fatal heart attack and drop dead at the scene. Guess what? What you did was just illegal - which means you are now dead to rights.
No Such Thing as a Belated Birthday
It's no secret that this list has been largely unfavorable toward women, but ladies everywhere will be thrilled to learn that certain things work in their favor. For instance, did you know it's illegal for a husband to forget his wife's birthday in Samoa? So ladies, expect a timely and thoughtful celebration every single year.
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