15 Shoulder Rides Gone Terribly Wrong

I wouldn't do that though
Ray Porter October 15th 2017 Humor
Offering to give someone a ride on your shoulder has many benefits. It's a nice gesture because it lets someone see the stage, when they might not be able to otherwise. Alternatively, it can be used to give someone a boost to a high place. It's also an intimate way to get close to someone--but they're not always as great as you might think. Here are some examples of some hilarious shoulder ride mishaps!
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Great Pain
In this photo, the look on this guy's face makes it very, very clear that he is in pain. He seems like a real soldier though, for continuing to hold someone on their shoulders so that they can see the show.
This One Might Hurt Even Worse!
While the last involves great physical pain, this one seems to involve great physical pain. This guy looks pretty damn bummed to be helping a woman he's into hookup. Talk about painful! This might be one of the worst shoulder rides ever captured on camera.
Basically a Ladder
Here, this guy looks completely miserable as well--but hey, at least he is being helpful. This image defies context, as it is clear that this guy's only purpose is to be a ladder--talk about a terrible duty to perform in life.
Staring
This photo makes this list not because of a terrible shoulder ride--but because it is hilarious. The girl on the guy's shoulders is actually doing fine, and the guy looks pretty content. The thing that makes this photo hilarious is the guy on the far left who was caught staring on camera.
Drowning
This photo looks like it was taken right before the guy in the water drowned. Seriously. This could not have been a good idea, luckily she can probably just fall back into the water if he starts to go under--but it still seems like a dangerous game to play.
Sad Boys Club
Here's another sad guy giving a girl a shoulder ride. Why even do it if your heart isn't in it, buddy? Maybe he just wants to be helpful, but he looks like he just wants to enjoy the show! Poor guy.
Prince Charming
This one is straight out of a Disney fantasy, and is one of the actual happy shoulder rides on this list. It's such a lovely photo, and both the guy and girl are playing their part fantastically to create a great image.
Oh no!
Terrible, this one is terrible. This little fella has clearly taken advantage of a shoulder ride in order to do his business. I feel really bad for this guy--who is probably the dad--for falling victim to this diabolical child's scheme.
So Awkward
This is such an awkward photo, this guy giving a girl a shoulder ride is a little bit too close to his buddy's crotch, at what is undoubtedly a terrible time to be there. This is just an awkward photo through and through.
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Helping Someone Cross the Road
Why did the chicken cross the road? Or... something like that. This is a very weird photo, and it is pretty hard to figure out what's going on here. Whatever's happening--the guy doesn't look too happy about it--making for a terrible shoulder ride.
The Many Faces of Being Unhappy
Three faces, all equally unhappy. This guy looks like he is really unhappy to have offered up this shoulder ride. In general, he just seems bored and like he'd rather be just about anywhere else--which is what makes this such a great photo!
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I'm Getting too old for this...
Another photo of pure regret. If this guy could escape, he definitely would. Here's a pro tip for all of you out there--don't offer up a shoulder ride unless you're really willing to deal with how terrible they can feel on your neck.
Stacking
This hilarious photo is a really creative way to turn a one seater couch into a two seater. It's genuinely really impressive, and a pretty funny play on the more traditional 'shoulder ride' technique. Props to this dynamic duo for their creativity!
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Why am I doing this again?
Imagine being right in the spotlight, but no one is looking at you at all. That's what's going on here. The only person looking at him was us as the audience of this photo--because the people at the crowd were focused on the performer.
I've Made a Huge Mistake!
This is the most quintessential photo of someone regretting offering to give someone a ride on their shoulder. No list would be complete without it, so of course we have decided to include it at the end of this list.
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